Recently this Dear Abby column came to my attention:

June 22nd, 2009

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I recently watched a comedy that featured men cross-dressing. Ever since, I have had a burning desire to have my husband wear sexy lingerie and makeup. There is nothing effeminate about him, but I can’t get this out of my head. I bought him a lacy bra and panty set, garter belt and stockings, but I haven’t had the nerve to ask him to wear them. Am I crazy? Should I try to forget this? — BURNING DESIRE IN NAHANT, MASS.

DEAR BURNING: Human sexuality is complicated. There are many women who help their husbands cross-dress, however it is my understanding that the initiator is usually the man. I don’t think you are crazy, nor do I think you should “forget” something that you describe as a “burning desire.” What I do think you should do is have a frank discussion with your husband and find out how open-minded he is on the subject.

Sound too good to be true? To many CD’s maybe, but not for a lot of crossdressers who enjoy fantastic relationships with their wives, partners or lovers.

You see, there are many partners or potential partners out there who find nothing wrong with You!  It’s just a matter of finding them, and meeting someone with an open mind.

For crossdressers currently in a relationship, explaining yourself can be difficult, and not always successful.  But You have to try to your best ability, to explain who and what you are.  Sometimes success can come easy, and sometimes it is difficult, but you don’t know unless you try. Personally, I’ve had success, and failure, which is all public knowledge these days in my book GET DRESSED!

While many crossdressers extol the benefits of having a TG mate, a lot of times these virtues can be a bit distorted. Many men who aren’t transgendered can be gentle, thoughtful, kind, loving and don’t mind doing the dishes or other housework. And many men who are crossdressers can be boisterous, arrogant and a real pain in the ass.  There is no preset mold for a person’s behavior, just because they wear a dress.

So remember, it is possible to have a successful relationship, even though you are transgendered. It does take a bit of work, though.


FYI:  As always, I constantly here people explaining who and what they are, and also whining when they are called something they don’t think they are.  Many people don’t seem to understand that TG LIFE… Transgendered Life, is named as such because publisher Brianna Austin and I both believe that the term transgendered is all encompassing to describe crossdressers, transsexuals, drag queens… whatever. This all encompassing reference wasn’t created by us – it has been around for years. 

So for those groups or individuals who are constantly complaining… “We’re heterosexual crossdressers, we’re not transgendered” or “I don’t want to be called transgendered because I am not changing my sex” – in our words… get over it!  Call yourself whatever you like but GET OVER THE WORRY ABOUT IT! I’ve met so many people that can’t seem to enjoy life because they are constantly fretting over useless problems! Don’t be one of them.

Remember; celebrate who you are!  Forget the nitpicking and the guilt and enjoy life!

Get Dressed, Get Out, Be Safe and Have Fun!

Gina Lance